全美第一段子手——奧巴馬，這才叫“談笑風(fēng)生”啊

然而你確定自己不是猴子派來的逗逼嗎？

每次演講聽眾都要爆笑N次，

當(dāng)之無愧的全美第一段子手——奧巴馬。

2015年白宮演講段子

2015年的白宮晚宴開場先開始了自黑.....
 

又吐槽了總統(tǒng)很辛苦哇....

然后又提到了拜登......尤其是賣披薩，笑死了~~

 

 

 

2016模擬面試段子

 

Stephen:

I do not see any promotions for the last eight years. That’s not always good. Can you explain that?
我發(fā)現(xiàn)你過去八年沒有任何職位提升，這樣可不好，你能解釋一下么？

Obama:

Honestly, there wasn't a lot of room for advancement in my last job.

坦白說，我的上一份工作沒什么升職空間。

The only one with a more powerful position was my wife.

唯一更高的職位是我老婆在做。

 

 

 

2016白宮演講段子

1."I know I was a little late tonight. I was running on CPT, which stands for jokes that white people should not make."

我知道我來的有點(diǎn)晚了。沒辦法，我們用的是CPT時(shí)間。這可是白人不能講的笑話哦。

His monologue then officially started. 好，開演了! CPT指的是Colored people time, 即有色人種時(shí)間。這里有對(duì)非裔美國人的stereotype，他們總是愛遲到。通過笑話直面種族歧視的現(xiàn)實(shí)，這也是巴馬的可愛之處了。（腦補(bǔ)一下：這笑話只有我能講，哼，因?yàn)槲沂切」e！）

2. You might have heard that someone jumped the White House fence last week, but I have to give the Secret Service credit. They found Michelle and brought her back. She's safe back at home now. It's only nine more months, baby. Settle down.

你們或許聽說過，上周有人私闖白宮護(hù)欄。在這里我要嚴(yán)重感謝特勤局，他們把我老婆Michelle找回來了。她現(xiàn)在在家很安全。（對(duì)他老婆說）靜下心來，寶貝！只不過還有九個(gè)月（我們就能離開這個(gè)鬼地方了）。

3. Next year at this time, someone else will be standing here in this very spot and it’s anyone guess who she will be.

明年這個(gè)時(shí)候，就會(huì)有另一個(gè)人以總統(tǒng)的身份站在這里演講。猜猜她是誰？

好了，你們猜猜她是誰吧。大家可以打個(gè)賭，明年十有八九就是她了。

4. "And there is one area where Donald's experience could be invaluable and that's closing Guantanamo because Trump knows a thing or two about running waterfront properties into the ground.”

倒是有一個(gè)領(lǐng)域床破的經(jīng)驗(yàn)一定能排上大用場，那就是把關(guān)塔那摩關(guān)了，因?yàn)楫吘顾麑?duì)房地產(chǎn)還是略知一二滴。

5.Helen Mirren is here tonight. I don't even have a joke here, I just think Helen Mirren is awesome. She's awesome.

海倫米倫今天也在，我都不想對(duì)她開玩笑。她很牛逼，很了不起。

你被這個(gè)逗逼逗樂了嗎？