與家庭婚姻生活相關的英語詞匯

TOPIC：婚姻;生活方式;

場景：

情感：婚姻;戀愛;幸福;離婚;

心理：如何培育健康的人際關系;如何處理負面情緒;

個人 & 伙伴：單打獨斗 & 合作共贏;融合;

【口語 + 寫作】

When it comes to marriage, what you don’t know really can hurt you.

談到婚姻，無知的確會構成傷害。

【經(jīng)典句式】

When it comes to… 談到……

Whether because of shyness, disinterest or a desire to preserve romantic mystery, many couples do not ask each other the difficult questions that can help build the foundation for astable marriage, according to relationship experts.

情感專家表示，無論是出于害羞、不關心，還是希望保留浪漫的神秘感，許多伴侶并不會互相詢問可以幫助建立穩(wěn)固的婚姻基礎但是難以回答的問題。

【經(jīng)典句式】

shyness害羞

disinterest不關心

desire欲望

preserve保留

romantic浪漫的

foundation基礎

a stable marriage穩(wěn)固的婚姻

relationship expert情感專家

In addition to wanting someone with whom they can raise children and build a secure life, those considering marriage now expect their spouses to be both best friend and confidant. These romantic-comedy expectations, in part thanks to Hollywood, can be difficult to live up to.

除了希望找到一個人生兒育女、安穩(wěn)地共度余生，那些想要結婚的人如今還期望另一半還是最好的朋友和知己。這種浪漫愛情喜劇般的期待要部分歸功于好萊塢，然而要實現(xiàn)這些期待并不容易。

【經(jīng)典句式】

in addition to …除了…還…

raise children生兒育女

build a secure life建立安穩(wěn)的人生

spouse伴侶

confidant知己

romantic-comedy浪漫愛情喜劇

in part thanks to部分歸功于……

live up to …實現(xiàn)

Sure, there are plenty of questions couples can ask of each other early in therelationship to help ensure a good fit, but let’s face it: most don’t.

誠然，在關系的早期，伴侶之間可以提出許許多多的問題來保證彼此般配。不過說實話，多數(shù)人并不會開口。

【經(jīng)典句式】

plenty of大量的

couple伴侶

ensure確保

“If you don’t deal with an issue before marriage, you deal with it while you’re married,” said Robert Scuka, the executive director of the National Institute of Relationship Enhancement. It can be hard to keep secrets decade after decade, and reticence before the wedding can lead to disappointments down the line.

“有問題如果不在婚前處理的話，就需要在婚后處理，”全美關系增進研究所(National Institute of Relationship Enhancement)的執(zhí)行總監(jiān)羅伯特·斯庫卡(RobertScuka)說。實在是很難年復一年地保守秘密，而婚前的緘默可能會導致后面的失望。

【經(jīng)典句式】

deal with處理

issue問題

executive director執(zhí)行總監(jiān)

enhancement鞏固

keep secret保守秘密

reticence緘默

lead to 導致

disappointment失望

down the line后期的

The following questions, intimate and sometimes awkward, are designed to spark honest discussions and possibly give couples a chance to spill secrets before it’s too late.

以下這些問題性質私密，有些還會帶來尷尬，但它們的目的是激發(fā)開誠布公的討論，給情侶們一個在無可挽回之前分享秘密的機會。

【經(jīng)典句式】

intimate私密的

awkward尷尬的

spark激發(fā)

honest開誠布公的

spill secrets分享秘密

1. Did your family throw plates, calmly discuss issues orsilently shut downwhen disagreements arose?

1. 當有分歧出現(xiàn)的時候，你的家人是會摔盤子、冷靜地討論，還是緘口不言?

【經(jīng)典句式】

calmly冷靜地

shut down關掉

arise出現(xiàn)

A relationship’s success is based on how differences are dealt with,said Peter Pearson, a founder of the Couples Institute.As we are all shaped by our family’s dynamic,he said, this question will give you insight into whether your partner will come to mimic the conflict resolution patterns of his or herparents or avoid them.

伴侶研究所(Couples Institute)的創(chuàng)始人之一彼得·皮爾遜(Peter Pearson)指出，一段關系的成功與否取決于如何應對分歧。他說，鑒于我們都會受到自己家庭的影響，這個問題將讓你一窺伴侶到底是會模仿父母的沖突解決模式，還是會加以避免。

【經(jīng)典句式】

deal with處理

founder創(chuàng)始人

institute機構;研究所

shape塑造

dynamic動態(tài)

give… insight into … 賦予……關于……的洞見

partner伴侶

mimic模仿

conflict沖突

resolution解決

pattern模式

2. Will we have children, and if we do,will you change diapers?

2. 我們是否會生小孩?如果生的話，你會換尿布嗎?

【經(jīng)典句式】

diaper尿布

change diaper換尿布

With the question of children, it isimportant to not just say what you think your partner wants to hear, according to Debbie Martinez, a divorce and relationship coach. Before marrying, couples should honestly discuss if they want children. How many do they want? At what point dothey want to have them? And how do they imagine their roles as parents? Talking about birth-control methods before planning a pregnancy is also important, said Marty Klein, a sex and marriage therapist.

離婚與情感問題顧問黛比·馬丁內(nèi)茲(Debbie Martinez)表示，談到孩子的問題，重要的是，不要只說你覺得伴侶愛聽的話。結婚之前，情侶們應該坦率地討論是否生小孩?生幾個?什么時候生?想象中自己當父母會是怎么樣的?性愛與婚姻咨詢師馬蒂·克萊因(Marty Klein)表示，在計劃懷孕之前討論避孕方法也很重要。

【經(jīng)典句式】

partner伴侶

birth-control method避孕方法

pregnancy懷孕

therapist咨詢師

TOPIC：婚姻;生活方式;

場景：

情感：婚姻;戀愛;幸福;離婚;

心理：如何培育健康的人際關系;如何處理負面情緒;

個人 & 伙伴：單打獨斗 & 合作共贏;融合;

【口語 + 寫作】

3. Will our experiences with our exes helpor hinder us?

3. 與前任在一起的經(jīng)歷對我們是會有所幫助還是阻礙?

【經(jīng)典句式】

hinder阻礙

Bradford Wilcox, the director of the National Marriage Project at the University of Virginia, pointed to research his organization has sponsored that indicated that having had many serious relationships can pose a risk for divorce and lower marital quality. (This can be because of a person having more experience with serious breakups and potentially comparing a current partner unfavorably with past ones.) Raising these issues early on can help,Dr. Wilcox said. Dr. Klein said people are “hesitant to explicitly talk about their past” and can feel retroactively jealous or judgmental. “The only real way to have those conversations in an intimate and productive way and loving way is to agree to accept that the other person had a life before the couple,” he said.

弗吉尼亞大學全美婚姻項目(National Marriage Project)的主任布拉德福德·威爾科克斯(Bradford Wilcox)，援引旗下團隊支持的研究指出，假如之前有過許多嚴肅的關系，則可能帶來離婚或婚姻質量較低的風險。(或許是因為，這樣的人經(jīng)歷了更多慘痛的分手，可能會將當下的伴侶與前任進行不利的比較。)威爾科克斯博士認為，一早提出這些問題會有所幫助?？巳R因博士則稱，大家“不愿直截了當?shù)卣劶斑^去”，還可能對以前的事情產(chǎn)生嫉妒或苛責的感覺。“以親密、有效且關愛的方式進行此類對話的唯一辦法是，接受對方和你在一起之前是有歷史的，”他說。

【經(jīng)典句式】

sponsor資助

indicate說明

pose a risk for 使有風險

marital quality 婚姻質量

break up分手

potentially潛在地

unfavorably不利地

raise… issue 提出…問題

hesitant猶豫的

explicitly直截了當?shù)?/p>

jealous嫉妒

judgmental苛責的

conversation對話

4. How important is religion? How will we celebrate religious holidays,if at all?

4. 宗教的重要性有多大?如果要慶祝宗教節(jié)日的話，會是怎樣的形式?

【經(jīng)典句式】

religion宗教

celebrate慶祝

religious holiday宗教節(jié)日

If two people come from different religious backgrounds, is each going to pursuehis or her own religious affiliation? Dr. Scuka has worked with couples on encouraging honest discussion around this issue as the executive director of the National Institute of Relationship Enhancement. What is more, spouses are especially likely to experience conflict over religious traditions when children are added to the mix, according to Dr. Wilcox. If the couple decide to have children, they must ask how the children’s religious education will be handled. It is better to have a plan, he said.

倘若二人來自不同的宗教背景，是各自踐行自身的宗教嗎?擔任全美關系增進研究所執(zhí)行總監(jiān)期間，斯庫卡博士為一些伴侶提供咨詢的時候鼓勵他們就這類議題進行坦率的討論。威爾科克斯表示，除此之外，當涉及到子女的時候，配偶之間尤其容易因宗教傳統(tǒng)產(chǎn)生沖突。如果兩人決定要小孩，他們必須探討如何處理孩子的宗教教育問題。他說，最好是有所規(guī)劃。

【經(jīng)典句式】

religious background宗教背景

pursue追求

religious affiliation宗教隸屬

executive director總監(jiān)

spouse配偶

likely傾向于;可能的

experience conflict over …碰到……的沖突

religious tradition宗教傳統(tǒng)

when… are added to the mix當涉及到……的時候

handle處理;解決

5. Is my debt your debt? Would you be willing to bail me out?

5. 一方有債，是否共同承擔?你是否愿意在經(jīng)濟上資助我?

【經(jīng)典句式】

debt債務

be willing to do sth 愿意……

bail… out拯救;撈人

It’s important to know how your partnerfeels about financial self-sufficiency and whether he or she expects you to keep your resources separate,said Frederick Hertz, a divorce lawyer. Disclosing debts is very important. Equally, if there is a serious discrepancy between your income and your partner’s, Dr. Scuka recommended creating abasic budget according to proportional incomes. Many couples fail to discuss sharing finances, though it is crucial, he said.

離婚律師弗雷德里克·赫茲(Frederick Hertz)表示，重要的一點是了解你的伴侶對財務獨立的看法，了解他或她是否希望將你們的財務分開管理。向伴侶披露自己的債務信息，是非常重要的。同樣地，如果你和伴侶之間收入差異很大，斯庫卡博士會建議你們根據(jù)收入比例，建立一個基本的支出預算。他說有很多情侶不談論分擔財務的問題，盡管這點極為重要。

【經(jīng)典句式】

financial self-sufficiency財務獨立

separate分開的

disclose披露

debt債務

discrepancy矛盾

income收入

recommend建議

budget預算

proportional按比例的

sharing finances分擔財務

crucial極為重要的

6. What’s the most you would be willing to spend on acar, a couch, shoes?

6. 為一輛車、一張沙發(fā)或一雙鞋，你最多愿意花多少錢?

【經(jīng)典句式】

be willing to do sth 愿意……

Couples should make sure they are on the same page in terms of financial caution or recklessness. Buying a caris a great indicator,according to Mr. Hertz. Couples can also frame this question around what they spend reckless amounts of money on, he said.

情侶們應該確保他們在財務方面的謹慎或冒進程度是一致的。據(jù)赫茲博士講，買一輛車是個不錯的衡量指標。他說，情侶們也可以把問題換成，他們會在哪些東西上無所顧忌地花錢。

【經(jīng)典句式】

in terms of 在……方面

be on the same page 達成一致

financial caution 財務謹慎

recklessness冒進

indicator指標

frame…設計框架

reckless無所顧忌的

TOPIC：婚姻;生活方式;

場景：

情感：婚姻;戀愛;幸福;離婚;

心理：如何培育健康的人際關系;如何處理負面情緒;

個人 & 伙伴：單打獨斗 & 合作共贏;融合;

【口語 + 寫作】

7. Can you deal with my doing things without you?

7. 你能接受我不帶你，自己去做一些事嗎?

【經(jīng)典句式】

deal with處理

Goinginto marriage, many people hope to keep their autonomy in certain areasof their life at the same time they are building a partnership with their spouse, according to Seth Eisenberg, the president of Pairs (Practical Application of Intimate Relationship Skills). This means they may be unwilling to share hobbies or friends, and this can lead to tension and feelings of rejection if it isn’t discussed. Couples may also have different expectations as to what “privacy” means, added Dr. Klein, and that should be discussed, too. Dr. Wilcox suggested asking your partner when he or she most needs to be alone.

培訓機構“親密關系技能實際應用”(Practical Application of Intimate Relationship Skills，簡稱PARIS)的總裁塞斯·艾森伯格(SethEisenberg)認為，在走進婚姻的時候，很多人在和配偶構筑伙伴關系的同時，也會想在某些生活領域保持自己的獨立性。這意味著，他們可能不愿分享自己的愛好或朋友，如果不就這個進行溝通，有可能會讓另一方產(chǎn)生被排斥感，導致二人關系緊張。克萊因博士則表示，對于尊重“隱私”到底意味著什么，雙方也可能會有不一樣的期待，同樣需要就此進行討論。威爾科克斯博士建議，可以問一問你的伴侶，他或她在什么情況下最需要個人空間。

【經(jīng)典句式】

going into marriage 走進婚姻;結婚

autonomy自治

spouse配偶

application應用

intimate relationship親密關系

be unwilling to do sth不情愿……

lead to導致

tension緊張

as to關于

privacy隱私

8. Do we like each other’s parents?

8. 我們喜歡彼此的父母嗎?

Aslong as you and your partner present a united front, having a bad relationship with your in-laws can be manageable, Dr.Scuka said. But if a spouse is not willing to address the issue with hisor her parents, it can bode very poorly for the long-term health of the relationship, he said. At the same time, Dr. Pearson said,considering the strengths and weaknesses of your parents can illuminate future patterns of attachment or distancing in your own relationship.

斯庫卡認為，只要你和伴侶立場統(tǒng)一，和姻親關系不好的問題就是可控的。但他說如果一方不愿解決與他或她父母有關的問題，對二人關系長遠的健康發(fā)展而言，就不是一個好兆頭。與此同時，皮爾遜博士表示，分析你父母的優(yōu)點和缺點，對了解二人未來的伴侶關系中的依戀或疏遠模式，會有所啟發(fā)。

【經(jīng)典句式】

as long as只要

present a united front立場統(tǒng)一

in-law姻親

manageable可控的

spouse配偶

be not willing to do sth不情愿……

address the issue 解決問題

bode very poorly for …不是一個好兆頭

long-term長遠的

health of the relationship關系的健康程度

strength優(yōu)點;長處

weakness弱點

illuminate說明

pattern模式

attachment依戀;附屬

distancing疏遠

9. How important is sex to you?

9. 性對你來說有多重要?

Couples today expect to remain sexually excited by their spouse, an expectation that did not exist in the past, according to Mr. Eisenberg. A healthy relationship will include discussion of what partners enjoy about sex as well as how often they expect to have it, Dr. Klein said. If people are looking to experience different things through sex — pleasure versus feeling young, for example —some negotiation may be required to ensure both partners remainsatisfied.

艾森伯格表示，如今的情侶期待能對伴侶在性方面保持興奮感，這在過去的夫妻身上是沒有的。克萊因博士認為，在一段健康的關系中，雙方應該能討論彼此在性方面的喜好和歡愛的頻率。如果雙方期待通過性所獲得東西不一樣，比如一方想獲得愉悅，另一方想藉此感覺年輕，可能就需要進行協(xié)商，以確保雙方都能繼續(xù)得到滿足感。

【經(jīng)典句式】

remain保持

spouse伴侶

a healthy relationship一段健康的關系

negotiation協(xié)商

require需要

ensure確保

10. How far should we take flirting with other people?Is watching pornography O.K.?

10. 與他人的調情可以進行到什么程度?看AV可以接受嗎?

【經(jīng)典句式】

flirt with調情

pornography黃片

Dr. Klein said couples should discuss their attitudes about pornography,flirting and expectations for sexual exclusivity.A couple’s agreement on behavior in this area can, and most likely will, change down the line, he said, but it is good to set the tone early on so both partners are comfortable discussing it. Ideally,sexual exclusivity should be talked about in the same way as other day-to-day concerns, so that problems can be dealt with before a partner becomes angry, he said. Dr.Pearson suggested asking your partner outright for his or her views on pornography. Couples are often too scared to ask about this early in the relationship, but he has frequently seen it become a point of tension down the line, he said.

克萊因表示，情侶們應該談論各自在色情作品、調情，以及雙方保持排他的性關系等問題上的看法。他說，情侶雙方就此達成的一致意見，很有可能還會在以后發(fā)生改變，但在早期定下基調是件好事，這樣雙方就可以自然地討論這類問題。他說，比較理想的是，應該像談論日常關心的其他事一樣，談論排他的性關系，這樣就提前處理了可能會出現(xiàn)的問題，避免出現(xiàn)惹怒對方的情況。皮爾遜建議坦率地問問你的伴侶對色情作品是什么看法。他說，情侶在關系發(fā)展的早期通常不敢問對方這個問題，但這點往往會在以后成為導致雙方關系緊張的一個方面。

【經(jīng)典句式】

pornography黃片

flirt調情

exclusivity排他性

likely可能的

set the tone 定下基調

earlyon在早期

ideally理想地

day-to-day日常的

concern關心

outright坦率地

tension緊張

11. Do you know all the ways I say “I loveyou”?

11. 你知道都有哪些表達“我愛你”的方式嗎?

Gary Chapman’s 1992 book, “The 5 LoveLanguages,” introduced this meansof categorizing expressions of love to strengthen a marriage. Ms. Martinez hands her premarriage clientsa list of the five love languages: affirmation, quality time, receiving gifts, acts of service and physical touch. She asks them to mark their primary and secondary languages and what they think is their partner’s, and discuss them. Mr. Eisenberg said that a couple needs to work out how to nurture the relationship, in a way specific to them.

在1992年的著作《五種愛之語》(The 5 Love Languages)里，加里·查普曼(Gary Chapman)介紹了這種區(qū)分表達愛的方式以鞏固婚姻的方式。馬丁內(nèi)斯給她那些即將結婚的客戶列出了這五種愛之語：肯定、愉悅時光、接到禮物、為對方服務、身體接觸。她讓他們在其中標出自己的第一和第二愛之語，也標出他們認為伴侶比較多采用的兩種，然后進行討論。艾森伯格表示，伴侶需要搞清楚如何用一種他們獨有的方式增進彼此的關系。

【經(jīng)典句式】

means方式

categorize區(qū)分

strengthen鞏固

hand遞給

client客戶

affirmation肯定

quality time愉悅時光;黃金時間

physical touch身體接觸

primary首要的

work out搞清楚

nurture培育

nurture the relationship增進關系

12. What do you admire about me, and what are your pet peeves?

12. 我身上有哪些東西是你比較欣賞的，又有哪些是你不能忍受的?

【經(jīng)典句式】

admire欣賞

pet peeve不能忍受的事

Can you imagine the challenges ever outweighing the admiration? If so, whatwould you do? Anne Klaeysen, a leader of the New York Society for Ethical Culture, said thatcouples rarely consider that second question. Ideally, marriage is a life commitment, she said, and it’s not enoughto just “click together,”as many couples describe their relationship. A marriage must go deeper thanthat original “click.”

你知道有些挑戰(zhàn)會消磨你對伴侶的愛慕之情嗎?如果知道，你會怎么辦?紐約道德文化學會(New York Society for Ethical Culture)的一名負責人安·克萊伊森(Anne Klaeysen)表示，情侶們很少考慮第二個問題。她說，在理想的情況下，婚姻是一生一世的相守，僅有“一見如故”是不夠的。這個詞是很多情侶在描述他們的關系時會用到的。但婚姻必須比最初的“合拍”走得更加深入。

【經(jīng)典句式】

outweigh超過

admiration愛慕;欣賞

ethical道德的

ideally理想地

a life commitment一生一世的約定

click together合拍

13. How do you see us 10 years from now?

13. 你覺得十年后的我們會是什么樣?

Keeping the answer to this question in mindcan help a couple deal with current conflict as they work toward their ultimate relationship goals, according to Mr. Eisenberg.

艾森伯格認為，將你對這個問題的答案記在心里，會有助于配偶一邊努力實現(xiàn)自己在婚姻關系上的終極目標，一邊解決眼下的沖突。

【經(jīng)典句式】

current目前的

conflict沖突

ultimate終極的

Dr. Wilcox said this discussion could also be an opportunity to raise the question of whether each partner will consider divorce if the relationship deteriorates,or whether they expect marriage to be for life, come what may.

威爾科克斯表示，這種討論也提供了一個機會，讓你可以了解伴侶是否會在雙方關系惡化時考慮離婚，還是說他們覺得，不管發(fā)生什么，婚姻都是一輩子的事。

【經(jīng)典句式】

raise the question of提出問題

deteriorate惡化